March 28, 2011-Our Subconscious Selves

Our Subconscious Self encompasses that part of our selves that we are not aware of consciously.  This aspect of our selves can be seen in others, however & this is one of the blessings of our relationships.  Sometimes, others are in our lives to show us our subconscious selves & issues as well as other aspects of our selves so that we can heal them.  Otherwise, we would be clueless as to what lies there & therefore clueless as to what is causing some of our problems.  So, embrace your relationship challenges for they are here to serve you & your healing journey on this planet.  Oftentimes, we strive to ignore what is bothering us in others because of feeling guilty about how we feel about them.  Once you recognize that they are you in a way, in a level of you that you are unaware of, then you can be grateful to them for showing you your self.  How would you know otherwise?  Make a list of everyone in your life that you are uncomfortable with, can’t stand to be with, are upset with or disagree with & then look at each one on the list & accept that they are you at the subconscious level or in some aspect of your self, showing you your self.  Be grateful that they are in your life showing you your self & pray for healing for them for as you do you pray for your self.  This is one of the more difficult concepts to understand & accept.  All of us walking around in different bodies makes it look as though we are completely independent of each other, completely separate from each other, completely different from each other.  It obscures the reality that we are all one.

A few years ago, I was in meditation.  It was a guided meditation led by a mentor but within just a few minutes of starting, the Holy Spirit took me in a different direction.  I don’t remember how the meditation was meant to begin but what I saw was a clear glass bowl of water upon which appeared a paper origami swan.  Suddenly the bowl disappeared from view & I was looking down onto the surface of a body of water at a living swan.  I began to be moved backwards toward the sky & as this happened what I could see in my field of vision expanded.  What had been a bowl of water now looked to be a pond & then a lake & then an ocean & then I began being pulled back ever more quickly as the United States came into view & then all of the Americas.  This continued on & there was the planet earth & the moon.  The sun & solar system soon appeared.  The feeling of rushing back intensified as I continued to be pulled away.  Soon the sun began to look like a star just like all the other stars in the cosmos & then I could see our galaxy & then it became smaller as other galaxies came into view.  Finally, in my field of vision, all I could see was an infinite black field filled with galaxies & as I continued to move backwards, farther & farther away, all of the galaxies converged to became just a single spot of light before me.  It was at this point that a very deep voice reverberated through me, saying “ALL ONE.”  I wish I could convey the intensity of this experience fully, especially the voice of God at the end.  I’m glad for the opportunity to write about it, to remember it again.  It’s all too easy to buy into the false appearance of the physical that we are all separate, different, disconnected & independent from each other.  This spiritual experience was a reminder to me that, despite what appears to be the truth in the physical, we are one.

By accepting that we are one, you open the way to healing your self & your subconscious self.  You may think that what others have done to you is unforgivable & that you could not possibly be guilty of doing to anyone what they have done to you.  I’m here to tell you that it is possible.  We wear our issues like the clown that has the sign on his back that says “Kick Me!”  We attract to our selves what we have said, done, thought, felt or believed whether we can remember it or not & whether we are aware of it or not.  This is where others play their part & come to our rescue by reading the sign & kicking us!  So if others are doing unto you what you don’t want done, then more likely than not, you have only yourself to blame & believe it or not, this is a good thing.  The alternative is that you are just unlucky, cursed, being unfairly picked on or a victim.  Taking responsibility for all that happens to you & your reaction to it puts the ball in your court.  What’s even more amazing is that when you take full responsibility for your self, the universe moves to deliver you from what you are holding that has been attracting all the abuse.  My favorite way of taking responsibility is through prayer & forgiveness work (Emotional Attunement).  These two methods have proven themselves over & over again to be effective at removing the “Kick Me” signs no matter the cause or the source of them.

What you will find when you have fully forgiven yourself & others for their part, is Divine Unconditional Love, Peace & Healing.  You may think this is not possible because of what has been done to you.  You may feel that others don’t deserve to be forgiven.  You may believe that it’s not in your power to forgive but I tell you that it is in your power because in doing so you release yourself from bondage.  You also help release others from their bondage.  When I was little, I was molested many times by my grandfather.  Fortunately for me, this was not the grandpa who raised me.  As I got older, I got better at avoiding him & preventing further abuse.  He passed over when I was 16 years old, much to my relief at the time & I have not seen him until just recently.  Needless to say, I had years of traditional therapy as a teenager & in my 30′s interspersed with a lot of nontraditional forms of therapy through the years.  A few years ago, I realized that I had finally healed from the abuse, had fully forgiven him & let it go.  I thought no more of it until about a month ago when I saw him in the dream state when I was visiting my grandma (his wife).  She passed over a little over 20 years ago & I’ve visited her in the dream state many times but she was always either alone or with other family members.  I was completely shocked, therefore, to see my grandfather with her this time. This was the first time I’d seen him in over 35 years. He was almost unbelievably transformed – loving, happy, healthy & whole. What was even more shocking to me was that, as I stood before him, I realized that not only had I forgiven him (which I already knew) but that I loved him!  Not at any point when he was alive, did I ever feel that I loved him.  I hugged him then & told him I loved him & in my mind I told him that I’d forgiven him.  I didn’t say that I’d forgiven him aloud because I’m never quite sure what is remembered, known or understood by others at that level.

I am not sharing this to show how enlightened I am, to gain sympathy or to impress anyone but to impress on you that forgiving others is in your power to do & to point out that if I can forgive my grandfather then you can forgive those who’ve hurt you as well.  I know that forgiving him transformed me, did my forgiving him transform him as well?

Love, Dawn


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March 6, 2011-Our Spiritual Selves

For me, sometimes, living in the physical has been like standing in the bottom of a very deep, very dark , very empty well yelling, “Hello!  Is anyone there?  Can you hear me?”  And all I could hear was the sound of my own voice echoing back at me.

Other times, it’s been like having one foot in the physical & one foot in spirit, feeling homesick, torn, divided & separated between the two.

Occasionally, it’s been like heaven.

There is very little guidance for most of us on how to heal & unify our spiritual self & our physical self.  How to bring our physical lives into alignment with our spiritual lives.  How to live a spiritual life in the physical.  What does that even look like?  Maybe saying prayers before bed as in our childhood?  Maybe saying grace before meals?  Going to church on Sunday?  Is that all there is to living a spiritual-physical life?  Probably not.  I suspect that very few people walking the planet today have fully integrated their spiritual self into their physical life & body.  I suspect that all of our lives would be very, very, very different from how they are right now if we were fully living as spiritual beings in the physical.  It has been one of my personal goals in life to work on this conundrum.  I know that I can tell you that I have struggled with it for almost as long as I can remember.  Maybe you have, too.  Or maybe you gave up long ago.  Whatever the case may be, stick around awhile longer & lets talk about our spiritual self & what it means to live a spiritual life in the physical.

I can look around & tell you what living a spiritual life is not about.  My daughter woke up one morning recently to the sound of a car crash.  She ran outside & a neighbor told her that someone had hit her car & driven off – a hit & run.  Thinking that the other car might not have made it very far, my son-in-law went walking & sure enough, there it was about a block away with a tell-tale gas cap embedded in it.  Oh, & did I mention that it was also sporting the Christian fish emblem on the back?  I’m pretty sure that if the driver had stopped & asked Spirit, “WWJD?” the answer wouldn’t have been “RUN!”  Why did they run?  They were probably drunk & didn’t want to get a DUI.  Or maybe it was a joy ride & not their own car or maybe they’re here illegally or they were driving without a license, without insurance or the car had stolen plates.  Whatever the reason, I can tell you that living a spiritual life means walking your talk, even when it’s difficult,  inconvenient, expensive or uncomfortable.  This is an extreme example but it illustrates the physical-spiritual split that exists in the day to day lives of many people.  What’s the solution?  Well, if you can’t live up to the dictates of your chosen religion, then you might want to choose another one.  Choose another one?!!!  Yes!!!  It’s more important for your insides & your outsides to match than it is for you to fit in with your culture, your family or any external standard, expectation or institution.  It’s nearly impossible for you to heal & integrate your spiritual self & your physical self if they are at odds with one another.  Bring them into alignment with one another & you can move mountains.

Of course, this may be easier said than done.  There are a lot of factors involved in aligning your insides & your outsides as I so elegantly call it.  What feels right on the outside may not be right on the inside & vice-versa.  As with other aspects, believe it or not, your spiritual self can be wounded & damaged.  There is an idea that gets thrown around in some circles that offers an explanation. “Any degree of separation (from God, self, source) can leave an opening for darkness.” Darkness, negativity, evil, interference, wrong-doing, mistakes, lack, limitation, misunderstandings, distortions, etc. can all be seen as different sides of the same coin.  The end result is the same – problems in the physical.  In fact, you can look at your physical body, life, experiences & relationships to determine the nature & current state of affairs of any or all of your aspects including your spiritual self.  Many times, by simply healing the different aspects of yourself, you can greatly improve all aspects of your physical experience.  That is one of the blessings of being physical.  You get the opportunity to perceive what’s wrong & also the opportunity to do something about it!  So, you’re wondering, how do you heal your spiritual self?  I’m glad you asked.  First off, you need to learn to discern your spiritual self.

Think of your spiritual self as a body very like your physical body that is not confined by physical laws, gravity or 3 dimensional reality.  This part of you has the ability to span time, distance, space.  It has the ability to be with God.  I tend to think of the spiritual self as almost like a bridge between the physical & the spiritual realms.  It is a part of you here but is also a part of God, therefore, making time to connect to God connects you with your spirit.  Pursuing spiritual practices will also nurture your spiritual self.  I would go so far as to say that just simply taking the time, daily, to acknowledge & pay attention to God & Spirit would increase your awareness of your spiritual self, strengthen your connection to your spirit & lead you to incorporate more of your spirit into your physical experience.  You will possibly never perceive spirit if you never open your self up to the possibility of perceiving spirit.  All it takes is willingness on your part.  I know Spirit is just waiting.

Many techniques that heal other aspects can be used to heal your spiritual self such as meditation, prayer & forgiveness work.  These spiritual practices, & many others that have evolved over thousands of years through thousands of religions & spiritual traditions, are now at your fingertips.  Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to locate what is right for you. You could go to a different house of worship every weekend of the year & probably not run out of religions to explore in your area.  Explore on the internet.  Attend classes at the local library & check out spiritual & religious books, videos, CD’s & DVD’s while you’re there.  Look everywhere with the expectation that  Spirit will help you every step of the way.  Open your self up to God & Spirit by assuming that you are never alone & talk out loud (or in your mind if others are around!) to Spirit.  Ask questions, ask for help & expect that you are being heard & that you will be answered.  You will know when you have found what you are looking for because it will bring you joy & peace.  Your spiritual practice & belief system should feed & nurture you physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually & energetically.  You should not have to force yourself, be bored or unduly stressed by it.  It should naturally flow as a part of you because you are a unique child of God, having a unique relationship with Spirit, walking your talk as only you can.

Love, Dawn


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February 24, 2011-Our Mental Selves

I have really had trouble reining my self in for each post that I’ve written in this series so far & “Our Mental Selves” is no exception.  I may have to cycle through the “Our Selves” series multiple times in order to get to say everything I’d like.  I was a little worried before starting that I wouldn’t have much to say with this one & the last one “Our Energetic Selves” but by the time I sat down, my mind was overflowing with thoughts & ideas.  I guess my mental self has been called upon.  For the purposes of this post today, our mental self includes our intelligence, intellect, thoughts, thought-forms, beliefs, ideas, words, mind, brain & thinking processes including abstract & concrete.

Our mental selves are a little like our physical selves in that they both receive more of our attention & acceptance compared to the other aspects of our selves, being of a more tangible nature than say, the energetic self.  So, for example, even though you can’t exactly put a finger on your thoughts, they appear to originate from the physical construct of the brain which gives them an aura of concrete reality & realness.  You could locate the mental self in the brain, for it’s apparent from our physical biology that much of our “mentality” is located in the brain but I don’t recommend this.  It’s probably more accurate to perceive your mental self as a body permeating your physical body.  Viewed in this way, you can see that your mental self, intelligence & mind are not limited to just your brain.  Every part of your body is intelligent.

The mental self can cause or contribute to problems in our lives & bodies just as any of our other aspects can & since “energy follows thought,” the potential is great for our mental self to cause a great deal of problems for us through our thinking & our thoughts.  Since we usually assume that our thoughts originate with us, we then proceed to buy into everything we think without discernment, believing all that we think.  You’ve heard the saying “don’t believe everything you hear”?  To this, I would add “or think” because your thoughts are not always just your own.  Some thoughts that arise unbidden in your mind are from God but some are from unhealed, wounded parts of your self, some from others in spirit whether of a pure nature or a wounded nature.  In the same way that you would weigh & measure the words of others, I would suggest that you weigh & measure your own thoughts.  Are they true?  clarifying?  accurate?  compassionate?  peaceful?  loving?  reasonable?  logical?  Do they lead you to make improvements in your life, body & relationships?  Or do they tear you or others down?  criticize?  attack?  judge?  condemn?  Do they stir up hate?  unforgiveness?  revenge?  anger?  Do they dwell on temporary negative conditions?  things out of your control?  what others are doing?  or have done?  The quality of your thoughts can indicate the source of them.  Needless to say, the loving thoughts of God feel very different from the wounded thoughts of others or of other parts of your self.  Don’t believe that you hear any thoughts but your own?  This is possibly true if you continuously occupy your mind with ongoing active thinking, although, I have heard Spirit talk to me right over the top of my own thinking so I know that active thinking is no actual impediment.  The best example I can think of, demonstrating that we can hear Spirit as our own thoughts, was one time that I was out of my body (OOBE) but heading back.  Usually, coming back into my body is instantaneous but this was one of those times that it wasn’t.  I was moving through a space similar to a hallway & up ahead of me & off to the left, I could hear a woman talking as if she were in a room off this hallway.  She continued talking as I moved past her & I continued to hear her voice as I moved away.  Gradually, as I merged with my body, her voice changed from it’s own distinct sound to the sound of my own thinking & continued on, sounding & feeling exactly like my own thoughts.  This experience, among others, confirmed for me that we have the ability to “hear” those in spirit in our minds as our thoughts.

The difficulty with “hearing” spirit in this way is learning to discern which thoughts are your own &  which are not.  To this end, I would suggest a few things.

  • Forgiveness Work or Emotional Work mentioned in a previous post “Our Emotional Selves” is also very effective with clearing & healing the mental self.  For myself, I found that as I did my “work,” I enjoyed greater & greater periods of time without any chatter in my mind.  A quiet mind can be key for many, as it was for me, to enable the voice of Spirit to be discerned.  Once you develop the ability to be quiet in your mind, the voice of Spirit is quite obvious.

  • Meditation works for some people by training the mind to be quiet & cease the chatter.  This training can then be used to listen to Spirit.  This technique has the benefit that it is available to anyone, there are many self-help books on the subject & it doesn’t require having access to a therapist.  It does require daily commitment though & it lacks the depth of healing & overall healing benefit offered by forgiveness work.

  • Practicing the Presence:  Choosing to practice the presence of God involves your willingness to be open to God, stated with intent & then sitting quietly, letting go of everything else.  It looks like meditation but is not because you are not focusing your attention on anything in the physical, you are not trying to stop thinking, you are not required to hold any particular position, chant any word or phrases or accomplish any goal other than being with God.  The Presence of God has the power to overcome all of your resistance, woundedness, fear & negative mental constructs, thoughts, beliefs, disordered & faulty thinking & rigid mind.  One of my mentors has developed a wonderful version of this technique that I am going to try to share here.  This can be done anytime but bedtime is especially good.  Say out loud or in your mind, “I choose to fill myself with the Divine Presence of God.”  This is the basic statement or intent to which more can be added such as “I choose to fill my bones, muscles, connective tissue”, etc.  Alternately you could start with your feet & move up adding your legs, etc.  You could go through the list of body systems such as pulmonary system, skeletal system or body organs & glands such as heart, etc.  You can expand this idea by choosing to fill your relationships, your different aspects such as your subconscious, emotions, emotional self, field, soul, spirit, mind, will, etc.  I always take a deep breath after each stated intent because I want to let go of all resistance to God & to receiving what I am asking.  Once you feel that you are done, then just lie there enjoying the feeling of being filled with God.  Sweet Dreams!

Love, Dawn


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January 7, 2011-Our Selves

My main purpose for this blog, is to address spiritual experiences but as a self-professed health nut & as an Holistic Therapist, I can’t ignore all the rest.  To ignore all the rest, is to see only a small fraction of ourselves.  We are so incredibly multifaceted, complex & wonderfully made, that to ignore any part of us is a grave mistake having serious consequences.  In order to be truly whole, healthy & happy, we need to become aware of & address the issues of every part of our selves including our spiritual, physical, emotional, mental, energetic & subconscious selves, leaving nothing out.  It’s easy to feel overwhelmed by all that we are & all that we can perceive & this is probably what drives us to find a magic bullet cure, a quick fix, a simple answer.  I have been as guilty of this as anyone but I have discovered along the way that, usually, there is no one simple answer to the questions of life or to the problems in our lives.  So, if I only write about spiritual experiences in this blog, I will be doing Spirit, myself & you a disservice. For this reason, this website & my posts will encompass the full spectrum of our selves & our lives as spiritual beings having a physical experience.   After all, there’s more to us than meets the eye.

This is the first in a series of posts dealing with the different aspects of our selves & how best to heal them.  That I know of so far, I will be covering our emotional, mental, spiritual, physical, energetic & subconscious selves.  I am not suggesting that this is all that we are or even that we literally have an emotional self, a mental self, etc.  We are in reality, much more complicated than this but I am dividing our selves up into manageable, descriptive bits so that we can talk about them.

In many ways, we are like a house divided against itself.  How much can we accomplish in a day, a month, a year, a lifetime,  if much of our energy is spent struggling against our selves?  This is what happens when every part of our self is not in agreement.  Conflicting needs & agendas are created by unhealed traumas, wounds & issues, past experiences, misunderstandings, damaging beliefs, unclear perceptions, false ideas, negative thoughts, emotional baggage & many other things.  As a result, we are unable to perceive ourselves clearly let alone know what we truly need or want according to the desires of our hearts planted there by God.  Then there are all the external influences throughout our life that affect us such as our family, friends, teachers, caregivers & co-workers, our home, environment & culture, our relationships & connections to others, books we’ve read, movies we’ve watched & so on & so forth.  These pull us every which way & can make it difficult to move forward in our life.  Additionally, there is the chaos & confusion generated when we take on things that are not ours to take on, things that are not who God created us to be.  All of this, successfully separates us from our true selves, our wholeness, our true hearts desires & God’s purpose for us.  From this perspective, it can be clearly seen, that true healing requires that we address all aspects of our selves.

What can be done to heal & become whole?  The best & first answer to this question is, “Ask to be healed.”  This should always be the first step before doing anything – remember Matthew 7:7-8 (on “My Favorites Collection” page)? By asking, we bring the power of our words & our will to bear on our lives, we give permission to God & Spirit to help us, we admit to ourselves that we can’t do it all & that we need help, we open our selves to accept that help & we become willing to be healed.  Asking removes obstacles to our healing.  Asking removes obstacles of every kind & believe me, we are full of obstacles.

Unsure of how to ask for help?  There is no one special formula for everyone.  It’s best to experiment, trying many methods, until you hit upon what works for you.  What I have found is that the below methods can all work.  It’s a good idea to hold the intent for the less traditional forms of asking/prayer that you are talking to Spirit.

  • Traditional Prayer:  This is probably the form of asking or prayer that is most familiar.  This can be a formal memorized prayer or an informal made-up-as-you-go prayer directed to God & said kneeling with hands clasped before you.

  • Beg & Plead Prayers:  This is one of my favorite forms because it has a good track record of working for me.  I know it isn’t necessarily Spirit’s favorite.  I know this because, more than once, I have been told that “Begging & pleading isn’t necessary” & Spirit one time actually said to me while I was in the midst of this prayer, “Enough with the begging & pleading!” So, it would appear, that it isn’t necessary from Spirit’s viewpoint to beg & plead but I think it can be necessary for us.  We are one of the biggest obstacles to receiving what we need & ask.  I think that by passionately praying in this way, we convince ourselves of our need, our sincerity & our worthiness to receive.  I think this kind of prayer also helps us overcome ego, arrogance & willfulness-major obstacles to moving forward on our path & into wholeness.  If you have children (or have seen children in a store!) then you already know how to pull off this prayer.  Just think of the last time your kids or maybe you as a kid, begged & pleaded for some special favor.

  • Meditation/Contemplation:  I consider this to be a form of prayer because it encourages communion with Spirit.  Where there is communion with God, there is communication – the very definition of prayer.  It can be helpful to set an intent for the meditation or to say a prayer before meditating if you have a specific need.  This form of prayer also teaches a very special skill that will serve you well if you desire to hear Spirit, that of learning to be still so that you can hear “the still small voice.”

  • Journal:  Keeping a diary or journal is a less traditional method but can easily be adapted to our purpose of asking by simply directing it to God & Spirit.  This method is especially helpful for getting the noise out of your head which can lead to feeling more peaceful & centered.  Many times, once everything is on paper, you know exactly what you need to do.  Writing can bring clarity to your mind & heart & offers another way to learn to hear Spirit.

  • Talk out loud or in your mind to Spirit/God:  I consider that much of my day is spent in prayer because I am often talking in my mind to God or Spirit as I go about my daily life.  Sometimes, I am specific about who I am talking to but often it is just to whoever is with me.  I think you will find that the more you talk to Spirit in this way, the more you will become aware of Spirit responding.

  • Talk to your favorite spiritual advisor in the physical or in spirit:  Directing your communication to someone you feel that you know, can make it easier to talk & get things off your chest.  This can be a minister or spiritual advisor that you know in the physical or it can be someone in spirit such as Jesus, Buddha, etc.  Simply hold the intent that through talking to this person, you are talking to God.

  • Talk to anyone in the physical who will listen to you:  This person can be anyone who loves you & whom you love.  To keep this from degenerating into gossip & to keep your words from creating what you don’t want, it is very important that you verbally set the intent with this person that you are venting, not gossiping & that you only need them to listen, not solve anything.  You must also intend that this verbal communication is to be directed to God/Spirit.

  • Write a letter:  This is similar to journaling but differs in that it is usually specific to a certain need or purpose.  It could be compared to writing a prayer down on paper & has the benefit that you can look back on it & see that your prayers are being answered.  This would also be a benefit found with journaling.  I have had the experience of praying & then forgetting about it.  When the answer comes, I almost don’t recognize it as an answer to a prayer!

  • One last final thought about asking & prayer:  Express gratitude in every prayer, no matter what form your prayer takes.  Be continuously grateful, even if it seems that you are not being heard or that your prayer requests are not being answered.  Gratitude has a similar effect as the Begging & Pleading Prayer in that it removes obstacles to our receiving.  Prayers of gratitude & thanksgiving belong in a class all to themselves, so make sure to make time for this.

What has worked best for you?  What are your thoughts on prayer?  In what other ways have you prayed that I have not listed here?  Leave a comment telling us.  Looking forward to hearing from you.

Love, Dawn


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